Glow Word Books Blog

Kids Jokes about Birds

kids jokes about birds

* How do flocks of crows stay together?
– Vel-crow!

* How does a penguin build a house?
– Igloos it together!

* Why was the crow on a telephone pole?
– He wanted to make a caw!

* What do you get if you cross a parrot and a shark?
– A bird that talks your ear off!

* Why did the owl say, “Tweet, tweet?”
– He didn’t give a hoot!

* What do you get if you cross a duck with a firework?
– A fire-quaker!

* How does a penguin make pancakes?
– With flippers!

* Someone said you sounded like an owl.
– Who?

* Why do pelicans carry fish in their beaks?
– They don’t have any pockets!

* Who’s a penguin’s favorite Aunt?
– Aunt-Arctica!

* What kind of bird doesn’t need a comb?
– A bald eagle.

* What’s an owl’s favorite subject?
– Owl-gebra!

* Where do penguins watch movies?
– At dive-in theatres!

* What do you call a funny chicken?
– A comedi-hen!

Doctor Jokes For Kids

Doctor Jokes for Kids

* What do you give a sick pig?
– Oink-ment!

* Why did the house go to the doctor?
– It had a window pane!

* Doctor, Doctor! How do I stop my nose from running?
– Stick your foot out and trip it!

* What does a dentist call his X-rays?
– Tooth pics!

* When does a doctor get mad?
– When he runs out of patients!

* Why did the bee keeper go to the doctor?
– She had hives!

* Doctor, Doctor! I feel like an apple.
– We’ll get to the core of this!

* Did you hear about the boy who felt like a pony?
– He was just a little hoarse!

* What did the doctor say to the patient after surgery?
– That’s enough out of you!

* What’s the best time to go to the dentist?
– 2:30 (Tooth hurty!)

* What did one tonsil say to the other tonsil?
– Let’s dress up! The doctor is taking us out!

* Doctor, Doctor! My son just swallowed a roll of film!
– Let’s hope nothing develops!

* Why didn’t the girl say she ate glue?
– Her lips were sealed!

* What’s white, furry, and shaped like a tooth?
– A molar bear!

* Doctor, Doctor! I think I’m a burglar!
– Have you taken anything for it?

* What do you give a sick bird?
– Tweet-ment!

* Where does a boat go when it’s sick?
– To the dock!

* Why did the book go to the doctor?
– He broke his spine!

* What did the psychologist say to the curtain?
– Pull yourself together!

Cow Jokes For Kids

cow jokes for kids

* What do you call a cow in the back yard?
– A lawn moo-er!

* What do call a cow that just gave birth?
– De-calf-enated!

* What do you call a sleeping bull?
– A bull-dozer!

* Where do Russians get their milk?
– From Mos-cows!

* What do you call a cow with two legs?
– Lean beef!

* Why do cows wear bells?
– Their horns don’t work!

* What do you call a cow you can’t see?
– Ca-moo-flauged!

* What do you get from a pampered cow?
– Spoiled milk!

* Where do cows ride on a train?
– The cow-boose!

* What do you get when you cross a cow and a goat?
– A coat!

* What did the cow say to the farmer?
– You butter milk me soon or I’m going to cream you!

* What did the farmer call the cow that had no milk?
– An udder failure!

* What do cows get when they are sick?
– Hay Fever

* What do you call a cow that plays a musical instrument?
– A Moo-sician!

* How do bulls drive cars?
– They steer them!

* What do you call cows with a sense of humor?
– Laughing stock!

* Where do cows go for entertainment?
– To the moo-vies!

* What do you call a cow with full armor?
– Sir Loin!

* What did the cow say when he heard a moo?
– I was just about to say the same thing!

* What do you call a grumpy cow?
– Moo-dy!

* What did mama cow say to baby cow?
– It’s pasture bedtime!

* What do you call a cow with no legs?
– Ground beef!

* What do cows play at concerts?
– Moo-sic!

* Why don’t cows have money?
– The farmer milks them dry!

* What happened to the lost cattle?
– Nobody’s herd! (Or… the farmer tractor down!)

* What do you call a cow with a twitch?
– Beef Jerky!

* Why was the cow a baker?
– He loved making cow pies.

* What do cows fly to the moon?
– Heli-cow-pters and Bull-oons!

Kids Madlibs: Photo Shoot

Mad Libs! Jumble of pencils
Fill out these questions to generate your own silly mad libs story instantly online! (Hint: a Verb is an action. An adverb usually ends in “ly” and describes an action (like slowly). A noun is a person/place/thing. An adjective describes a person/place/thing.)

Things (plural):

Adjective:

Song Title:

A Celebrity:

Feeling:

Verb:

A Place:

Food:

Things (plural):

Person:


This is a silly online story that will be completed with your words. Please answer the questions below and click the generate button to read the story with your words included!

Body Jokes For Kids

body jokes for kids

* Why shouldn’t you wear a cardboard belt?
– It would be a waist of paper!

* What did the skeleton order for dinner?
– Spare ribs!

* What did the left hand say to the right hand?
– How you can be always right?

* What makes music on your hair?
– A head band!

* What do you call a bear with no ear?
– B!

* Why is your nose in the middle of your face?
– Because it is the scenter!

* When are your eyes not eyes?
– When the wind makes them water!

* What smells the best at dinner?
– Your nose!

* What’s the most musical bone?
– The trom-bone!

* What kind of shoes does a plumber hate?
– Clogs

* What do you call a bear with no teeth?
– A gummy bear!

* What has no fingers, but lots of rings?
– A tree!

* What has a bottom at the top?
– Your legs!

* Do you look in the mirror after washing your face?
– No, you look in a towel!

* Did you pick your nose?
– No, I was born with it!

They’re not technically a body part, but here’s a couple booger jokes as well! (I couldn’t resist!)

* What do you call a skinny booger?
– Slim pickins!

* What’s the difference between boogers and broccoli?
– You can’t eat broccoli!

* What do you find inside a clean nose?
– Fingerprints!

Dinosaur Jokes For Kids

dinosaur jokes for kids

* What are dinosaurs floors made out of?
– Rep-tiles!

* Which dinosaur always crashed his car?
– Tyrannosaurus wrecks!

* Why can’t you hear a pterodactyl in the bathroom?
– The ‘p’ is silent!

* What does a triceratops sit on?
– Its tricera-bottom!

* What makes more noise than a dinosaur?
– Two dinosaurs!

* What do you call a dinosaur with no eyes?
– Doyouthinkhesaraus!

* What do you call a sleeping dinosaur?
– A dino-snore or a Stego-snorus!

* What did dinosaurs have that no other animal had?
– Baby dinosaurs!

* What did the dinosaur say after she walked into a boulder?
– I’m-so-saurus!

* What do you get if you cross a pig with a dinosaur?
– Jurassic Pork!

* Who did dinosaurs call for help?
– Tricera-cops!

* How do you know if there’s a dinosaur under your bed?
– Your nose bumps the ceiling!

* What’s as big as a dinosaur but weighs nothing?
– His shadow!

* What came after the dinosaur?
– Its tail!

Chicken Jokes For Kids

chicken jokes for kids

In honor of “Do The Chicken Dance Day” (May 14), we have posted some bad yolks about chickens…

* What did the chicken do when the traffic light turned green?
– Egg-celerated!

* How do chickens wake up in the morning?
– With an alarm cluck!

* How do chickens get away in a hurry?
– They scramble away!

* Why did the chicken cross the playground?
– To get to the other slide!

* What do you get if you cross a chicken with a cow?
– Roost beef!

* Why do hens lay eggs?
– If they dropped them, they’d break!

* Why did the chicken join the band?
– She had the drumsticks!

* Why did the rooster cross the road?
– To cock-a-doodle do something!

* What happened when the chicken ate gun powder?
– She eggs-ploded!

* What do you call it when it rains chickens and ducks?
– Foul weather!

* What do you get when a chicken lays an egg on top of a barn?
– An egg-roll!

* Why is it easy for chicks to talk?
– Because talk is cheep!

Superhero Jokes For Kids

superhero jokes for kids

* What’s the difference between Batman and a robber?
– Batman can go into a store without robin!

* What does Spiderman do for a living?
– He’s a web designer!

* What is a superhero’s favorite drink?
– Fruit punch!

* When does Poison Ivy change her underwear?
– When they are soiled!

* What is it called when Iron Man does a cart wheel?
– A Ferrous Wheel!

* What is Spider-Man’s favorite month?
– Web-ruary!

* What do you get if you cross the man of steel with veggie broth?
– SOUPerman!

* What is a villain’s favorite part of the joke?
– The punch line!

* What superhero uses public transportation?
– BUS Lightyear!

* What would you find in Superman’s bathroom?
– A Superbowl!

* Why doesn’t Superman have many friends?
– He wears his underwear over his pants!

* Why did Bruce’s date go badly?
– He has BAT breath!

* What does a superhero put in their drink?
– Just ice!

* Why couldn’t Batman go fishing?
– Robin ate all the worms!

Art Jokes for Kids

art jokes for kids

* What did the artist draw before he went to bed?
– The curtains!

* Why did the paintbrush see a doctor?
– It had a stroke!

* What does a momma color wheel say to a baby color wheel?
– Don’t use that tone with me.

* What’s green and smells like blue paint?
– Green paint!

* Why was the artist afraid he might go to jail?
– Because he’d been framed!

* How do you inspire an artist?
– Easel-y

* What does Salvador Dali have for breakfast?
– A bowl of surreal!

* What’s orange and sounds like a parrot?
– A carrot!

* Did you hear about the artist that always took things too far?
– She didn’t know where to draw the line.

* Which animals are famous painters?
– Pablo Pig-caso and Vincent van Goat!

Birthday Jokes For Kids

Birthday Jokes For Kids

* What is the left side of a birthday cake?
– The side that’s not eaten!

* What has wings, a long tail, and wears a bow?
– A birthday pheasant!

* Why did the birthday cake go to the doctor?
– It was feeling crumby!

* Where do you find a birthday present for a cat?
– In a cat-alogue!

* What does every happy birthday end with?
– The letter Y.

* Why did the boy hit his birthday cake with a hammer?
– It was pound cake!

* What did the bald man say when he got a comb for his birthday?
– Thanks. I’ll never part with it!

* What does a clam do on his birthday?
– He shell-abrates!

* What do they serve at birthday parties in heaven?
– Angel food cake!

* What do you get every birthday?
– Another year older!

* What did the Teddy Bear say after blowing out his birthday candles?
– No cake for me… I’m stuffed!

* How can you tell if an elephant’s been to your birthday party?
– He left footprints in the ice cream!

* Does a green candle burn longer than a yellow one?
– No, they both burn shorter!

* What birthday cake is as hard as a rock?
– A marble cake!

* Why didn’t the caveman send birthday cards?
– The stamps kept falling off his rocks!

* Why do we put candles on top of birthday cakes?
– It’s too hard to put them on the bottom!

Knock-knock!
Who’s there?
Wanda!
Wanda who?
Wanda wish you a happy birthday!