Glow Word Books Blog

Teacher Jokes For Kids

teacher jokes for kids

* What happened to the math teacher’s plant?
– It grew square roots!

* What happened to the teacher who took the school bus home?
– The police made her bring it back!

* What’s the worst thing that can happen to a geography teacher?
– Getting lost!

* Did you hear about the teach who took attendance?
– He was ABSENT-minded.

* Why did the children eat their homework?
– The teacher said it was a piece of cake.

* Why did the snake get a detention?
– He was HISSpering!

* Why did the teacher write on the window?
– She wanted the lesson to be clear!

* What meals do math teachers eat?
– Square meals!

* What tests do witch teachers give?
– HEX-aminations

* Where did the music teacher leave her keys?
– In the piano!

* What is a math teacher’s favorite sum?
– Summer!

Short Kids Poem: Vegetables & Pets

kids poems vegetables and pets

My bison won’t eat broccoli.
My panther won’t eat peas.
My mice will not eat mushrooms.
It’s only cheese they please.

I’ve tried to feed my cow
a healthy dose of kale,
but she just turns her nose
and flicks it with her tail.

I wish they’d even eat a bite!
I think that would be great
since I cannot get up to play
until I clear my plate.

Short Kids Poem: The Moon

short kids poem moon

I’m waiting for a rocket ship
to take me to the moon.
My best friend has been building one.
He’ll pick me up by noon.

First we’re going to skip moon rocks
across the milky way.
And then we’ll ask some aliens
to dance the Moon Ballet.

I think we’ll do some fishing
for comets passing by.
We likely won’t catch any,
but it’s still fun to try.

It always takes my breath away
to see Earth from on the air.
But soon I’ll have to come back home—
There are no bathrooms there.

Snowmen Jokes For Kids

snowman jokes for kids

* What did one snowman say to the other?
– Do you smell carrots?

* What’s white and goes up?
– A confused snowflake!

*What do you sing at a snowman’s birthday party?
– Freeze a jolly good fellow!

* How was the snow globe feeling?
– A little shaken!

* Where do snowmen keep their money?
– In a snow bank.

* What falls at the North Pole, but never gets hurt?
– Snow!

* What’s a snowman’s favorite lunch?
– Ice bergers!

* How do you scare a snowman?
– With a hairdryer!

* Where do snowmen dance?
– The snow ball!

* What do you call an old snowman?
– Water!

Christmas Elf Jokes For Kids

elf jokes for kids

* Why did the elf sleep in the fireplace?
– He wanted to sleep like a log!

* Why was Santa’s helper sad?
– He had low elf esteem.

* What do elves learn in school?
– The elf-abet.

* What do you call an elf who steals wrapping paper from the rich and gives it to the poor?
– Ribbon Hood!

* Which elf sings the best?
– ELFis Presley!

* What is white, green and red all over?
– A sunburned elf.

* What do elves do after school?
– Their gnome work!

Kids Madlibs About A Gingerbread Man

Mad Libs! Jumble of pencils
Fill out these questions to generate your own silly mad libs story instantly online! (Hint: a Verb is an action. An adverb usually ends in “ly” and describes an action (like slowly). A noun is a person/place/thing. An adjective describes a person/place/thing.)

Place:

Adjective:

Verb (action):

Food:

Things (plural):

Profession:

Thing:

Color:

Celebrity or someone famous:

Animal:


This is a silly online story that will be completed with your words. Please answer the questions below and click the generate button to read the story with your words included!

Christmas Jokes For Kids

christmas jokes for kids

* Why does Santa go down the chimney?
– It SOOTS him!

* Why is it cold during Christmas?
– It’s Decemberrrr!

* What nationality is Santa?
– North Polish

* Who says, “Oh, Oh, Oh?”
– Santa walking backwards!

* Where does Santa stay when he’s on vacation?
– A Ho-ho-tel!

* What is Santa’s dog called?
– Santa Paws!

* What’s instrument do reindeers play?
– Horns!

* What did the bald man say when he got a comb for Christmas?
– Thanks! I’ll never part with it!

* What’s the best Christmas present?
– A broken drum… you can’t beat it!

* Why is Santa so good at karate?
– He has a black belt!

* What kind of motorcycle does Santa ride?
– A Holly Davidson!

* What does Christmas have in common with a cat living on a beach?
– Sandy claws!

* What do monkeys sing at Christmas?
– Jungle bells, jungle bells!

* Where does Santa vote?
– The North Poll!

* What did the Gingerbread Man put on his bed?
– A cookie sheet!

* Which reindeer has bad manners?
– RUDEolph!

Cat Jokes For Kids

cat jokes for kids

* What do you call a cat in an automobile?
– A car-pet!

* Why are cats good at video games?
– They have nine lives!

* Why don’t cats like shopping online?
– They prefer cat-alogs!

* What’s worse than raining cats and dogs?
– Hailing taxis!

* Where did the kittens go on a field trip?
– The mew-seum!

* What looks like half of a cat?
– The other half!

* Why do cats make terrible story tellers?
– They only have one tail.

* Why do cats like TV remotes?
– It has a paws button!

* What is a cat’s favorite color?
– Purrr-ple.

* Have you ever seen a catfish?
– No. How does he hold the fishing pole?

* What do you call a cat that was caught by the police?
– A purr-patrator.

* What do cats eat for breakfast?
– Mice Crispies!

Short Kids Poem: Wishing Well

kids poem wishing well

I came across a wishing well
and had a coin to spare.
I closed my eyes and made a wish
then tossed it in the air.

I asked for my own wishing well.
(The smartest wish to make!)
I felt my craving coming true:
the ground began to shake.

I ran back home to my bedroom,
but where was my own well?
It had to be here somewhere
since I used a magic spell.

I search until the sun had set.
There’s nowhere it could hide.
Then I saw that my sink was full
with one cent by its side.

I’m glad I got another wish,
but I had wanted more.
So I’ll ask for magic lamps
with real genies galore!