* How do brave Egyptians write?
– With Hero-glyphics!
* What did Pharaoh say when he saw the pyramid?
– Mummy’s home!
* Why don’t mummies take vacations?
– They’re afraid to relax and unwind!
* What did the old Egyptian get by staring at the river?
* What did King Tut say when he had a nightmare?
– I want my mummy!
* Where do Pharaohs like to eat?
– Pizza Tut!
* Did you hear about the tense mummy?
– He was all wound up!
* Where do mummies go for a swim?
– To the dead sea!
* Why didn’t Cleopatra go to the psychiatrist?
– She was the Queen of Denial!
* Did you hear about the angry mummy?
– He flipped his lid!
* Why was the Egyptian kid confused?
– His daddy was his mummy!
* What music do mummies list to?
* Which underwear does King Tut wear?
– Fruit of the tomb!
* Do mummies enjoy being mummies?
– Of corpse!
* What does King Tut’s secretary say on the phone?
– The King can’t talk right now. He’s all wrapped up!
* What kind of girl does a mummy take on a date?
– Any old girl he can dig up!
* What did one pyramid say to the other?
– How’s your mummy!
* What do they say at ancient Egyptian funeral homes?
– Satisfaction guaranteed, or double your mummy back!
* What do you call an Egyptian doctor?