* What do you give a sick pig?
* Why did the house go to the doctor?
– It had a window pane!
* Doctor, Doctor! How do I stop my nose from running?
– Stick your foot out and trip it!
* What does a dentist call his X-rays?
– Tooth pics!
* When does a doctor get mad?
– When he runs out of patients!
* Why did the bee keeper go to the doctor?
– She had hives!
* Doctor, Doctor! I feel like an apple.
– We’ll get to the core of this!
* Did you hear about the boy who felt like a pony?
– He was just a little hoarse!
* What did the doctor say to the patient after surgery?
– That’s enough out of you!
* What’s the best time to go to the dentist?
– 2:30 (Tooth hurty!)
* What did one tonsil say to the other tonsil?
– Let’s dress up! The doctor is taking us out!
* Doctor, Doctor! My son just swallowed a roll of film!
– Let’s hope nothing develops!
* Why didn’t the girl say she ate glue?
– Her lips were sealed!
* What’s white, furry, and shaped like a tooth?
– A molar bear!
* Doctor, Doctor! I think I’m a burglar!
– Have you taken anything for it?
* What do you give a sick bird?
* Where does a boat go when it’s sick?
– To the dock!
* Why did the book go to the doctor?
– He broke his spine!
* What did the psychologist say to the curtain?
– Pull yourself together!