About Natasha Hanson

Natasha Hanson is the author of On The Day I Got My Period. View her Profile.

Why I gave up magazines

I gave up reading magazines a year ago. I always had a love-hate relationship with them… I would binge on them from the corner store and then wonder whatever possessed me to get them. I knew the pictures were photoshopped, the models were anorexic and that I would never look like either — but that didn’t make me give up the magazines. It just made me read them differently (with more curiosity and less jealousy).

I never liked the amount of advertising. Pages and pages of commercials — even before the table of contents. Pages and pages of products between the stories. However, I have a degree in marketing so it was interesting to see what techniques (mainly sex) they were using to sell products.

What ultimately made me give up magazines was the advertising in the articles. A friend’s company got in a big magazine not because they were the best at what they do, but because their public relations people struck a deal to do a story. The stories were a ruse! The best places to travel were paid advertisements. The top tips were propaganda from the highest bidder. Everything in the magazine was fake. I was paying money to read advertisements.

So I gave them up… and now spend more quality time with my son!

Fiery Redhead: Why I don’t label people

What labels do you have?

When I was younger I was called a fiery red hair — implying that I had a temper. The more I heard that, the more I played into that persona. As I have gotten to know myself better, I realized I’m not at all fiery. I’m actually a passive, calm person.

My sister was called a “dumb blond” because of her hair color. As an adult, she told me that she felt stupid her whole life — even though she has a university degree and is even smarter than me.

How do we get those labels?
Obviously friends and family have a big influence over your labels, but don’t underestimate the power of media. On television, women loose all their postpartum in a few weeks — it’s really easy to call myself fat because I still have mine a few months after birth. But frankly my weight seems more natural than liposuction, personal trainers and anorexic diets to shed the pounds.

How do we combat labels?
The biggest way to combat labels is self-esteem. As I became more comfortable with myself, I realized I didn’t want to be the fiery redhead. I also didn’t need to be the stick-thin mother 3 weeks after birth. I want to be me, not who others tell me I should be.

Don’t compare yourself. Every person is different and that’s a great thing! No two lives are exactly the same. We are all peppered with different experiences… so why do you think you can compare yourself to others without taking the other person’s entire history from birth into account?

Don’t label others. If you don’t like getting labels, don’t give them to others — or be very careful to only use positive labels. When I heard people calling my younger brother a lazy teenager, I asked them to stop because I didn’t want him to call himself lazy.

Thanks for reading this blog you caring, thoughtful, successful, beautiful, smart reader!

How to have a cheap wedding

Courtesy of KimberlyNelsonPhotography.com

Here are 15 tips to help you with a fun, memorable, creative — but affordable — wedding.

1)Get friends to help. It takes a village to pull off a wedding.

There is so much that goes into a wedding that it’s nearly impossible to do it yourself. We had friends help prepare the food, open our reception hall, decorate the hall, arrange the flowers, transport gifts, clean up the hall and even got an uncle to preside over the ceremony! We were very thankful to have so many people all contributing their talents for our big day. Once we had arranged everyone’s job, the day of the wedding went smoothly because everyone was pitching in. With all of the emotions of your wedding, I’m glad I didn’t have to do many tasks on the actual day because it was stressful enough just to get married. Thanks to everyone for pitching in!

2) Find cheap flowers
The cheapest wedding bouquet I could find was $70, which seemed crazy for a handful of flowers to accompany me down the aisle. So we went to the farmer’s market in downtown Minneapolis and picked out 15 bunches of beautiful flowers. It was such a fun morning wandering all the stalls and hand selecting the flowers I liked best. My aunt formed some of them into a bouquet and the rest we used to decorate the chapel and reception hall.

3) Don’t tell vendors you’re planning a wedding.
As soon as we mentioned the word “wedding” it felt like the prices suddenly doubled. So we booked cakes, halls and everything else without ever mentioning it was for our big day.

4) Mates rates
Do you know professional caterers, florists or photographers? Odds are they’ll give you a deal if you’re friends. We were lucky to know a fabulous wedding photographer. Not only is she super talented, but it was nice to support a friend.

5) Consider alternative venues
We had our wedding at a historic church that was much more affordable than renting a church (if you’re not a member). And our reception was at an old train depot in a park. Because the venue was run by the St Paul parks department, it was a quarter of the price of the hotel and spilled out into a beautiful, lush garden. You can also consider hosting your reception at a family member’s home.

6) Always read the fine print
There were many fantastic venues that seemed like a good deal, but when you read more carefully they make you spend a minimum amount for food, drinks or service — all of which are quite expensive. Pricey catering doesn’t always mean good catering. Do you have to buy their catering? Can you bring your own cake? Do they charge extra if you use your own pastor?

7) Entertainment can be free
Everyone has one friend that knows about good dance music — just be sure they include the chicken dance! For our wedding dance, we spent a night throwing our favorite sons on an iPod and then danced the night away. During the reception, we asked relatives and close friends to give short speeches. They were all touching and very memorable for my husband and I. During the ceremony, include family and friends in the service. Have them sing your favorite songs or read meaningful passages.

8) Make videos and slide shows for the reception
My husband and I are from two different countries, so we prepared little videos from the other country so that both sides of the world could be included. We recorded short speeches from family members who couldn’t make it and slides shows about our lives in the other countries.

9) Consider making your own food.
Food is important to my husband and I. We wanted our guests to feel appreciated and we wanted a sense of abundance around our wedding. (There’s nothing worse than leaving a wedding hungry). So we did a big supermarket run to get loaves of bread, tons of fresh veggies, and nuts. Our family prepared a creative make-your-own cookie bar filled with different frostings and sprinkles. For our main dish, we ordered gourmet pizzas from one of the first restaurants we ever went to. We liked the gourmet pizza because it was still somewhat classy, but fun. Why not have a fun reception?

10) Find a cheap dress.
You don’t have to wear a wedding dress to a wedding. I found an elegant, white prom dress and a friend of mine wore a sweet sixteen dress. If you aren’t shopping in the wedding section, you can find dresses for under $200. Even though I was in a prom dress, I still felt like a princess — but that was because I was marrying the husband of my dreams. The dress was just the dress.

11) Vintage stores
Look at vintage stores for bridesmaids dresses and tuxedos. My husband got a vintage tuxedo that was half the price of renting one. Plus, now we have a tuxedo that he can wear whenever he wants. (Formal breakfast in bed?) It doesn’t save money — but don’t forget to bring comfortable shoes for the reception. Nobody wants blisters from their wedding.

12) Let your bridesmaids wear their own dresses
If you have ever been a bridesmaid before, you usually end up with a hideous, strange colored dress that never gets worn again. So why not let your bridesmaids choose their own dresses? Give them some color or style guidelines and let them run free. Our pictures look a bit more natural because everyone is comfortable and happy in their clothing.

13) Ask for your honeymoon suite as a gift
My sister wanted to get us something really nice for our wedding, so she offered to pay for our honeymoon suite. At the end of an exhausting day, we were grateful to have somewhere relaxing to crash. We would have never thought to get a hot tub in the room, but it was great on our tired feet.

14) Do what’s important to you
What is important for your dream wedding? A cake was important to my husband, so we spent extra time and money on the cake. Music was important to my sister in law, so they hired professional musicians for their ceremony. Focus your time and energy on what’s important to you… otherwise you’ll spend a lot for everything instead of just the things that need extra money.

15) Accept imperfection
The last tip doesn’t really save money, but it’s still important: Nothing is perfect. There will be some hitch in your wedding… but don’t let that flaw ruin your day. Being happy on your wedding day is more important than having the perfect wedding. After all, you’re finally marrying the man of your dreams!

The Wish Tree

Courtesy Kim Nelson Photography

Before I got married I was just like every other future bride and paged through old wedding magazines to get ideas about how to make our big day special.

My favorite idea I found was a wish tree. A wish tree is comprised of sticks standing in a vase. Guests can write a wish for the couple on a small note card and attach it to the tree with ribbon. Some people even use them as guest books.

It’s a great reminder of our wedding and more personal than a photo of us on the wall. It really reminds us of the community of friends/family that came together for our us.

This week I had to move the wish tree to baby-proof our home and read through a lot of the wishes. they were all about a blessed, happy family — all of which has come true!

If you need a creative idea to celebrate a birthday, special occasion or get-well, I would highly recommend one.

How to tell when labor is starting: You know!

My midwife warned me that first time mums tend to go into labor a week or so after their due date… but that didn’t stop me from obsessing about my due date a week before I was due.

Every day I worried that today was going to be the day and we weren’t ready. Did we have enough food? Why hadn’t we installed the car seat yet? Was the nursery complete? I knew it was crazy: all babies really need is breast milk and diapers, but all I could think about was the upcoming birth.

I started pre-labor contractions pretty early, but they never lasted very long and never formed that regular pattern. I don’t know how many times I googled “when are you most likely to have your baby.” Each page said there was no way to predict your due date, but I kept searching for a prediction.

The day I gave birth, I was completely sick of being pregnant. I remember crying and asking my husband if I would actually give birth. I was so excited to meet my kid and it seemed so cruel to wait any longer.

At midnight I went into labor and I had to laugh at myself because there was no doubt I was in labor. The old quote “if you question whether you are in labor, you probably aren’t” rang true. The warm-up contractions I had been feeling for two weeks didn’t even compare. If you are googling this blog post to see if you are in labor, I can say you most certainly aren’t!

Boy or Girl: Old Wives’ Tales

Starting on week two of our pregnancy, both my husband and I were sure we were going to have a boy… we both wanted a surprise, so it was a long 9 months of waiting to see if we were right.

My mum uses a crystal on the end of a string to check the sex of chicken eggs, so she tried that on me. She couldn’t remember if “boy” was round and round in circles or back and forth in a straight line, so she did it once over my belly and once over mind head. The chicken sexing string said I would have a boy!

The old wives’ tale says that light morning sickness is a sign of a boy, so that was another vote for boy.

Baby girls are supposed to make husbands beef up, but my husband was staying the same weight… so we had three votes for a boy and my husband also had a dream about talking to our son.

Low and behold, we now have a little baby boy who is laying here happily on my lap while I type. Now I’m really curious to see if these old wives tales hold true for our next baby… whenever that may be.

Did you wait to find out the gender of your child? How well did all of the old wives tales work for you?

Happy White Rabbits!

I grew up in a superstitious household. To this day I still don’t walk under ladders, put my shoes on the table, break mirrors or open an umbrella inside. I’m guessing many of these superstitions were invented to discourage you from doing certain behaviors, but it’s hard for me to separate out the reason from the superstition. I still vividly remember breaking a lipstick tube mirror and worrying more about the seven years of bad luck than the broken glass.

I never realized how superstitious my family was until I met my husband. He comes from a much more scientific family — but I have still managed to get him to say “White Rabbits” on the first of the month.

In case you didn’t know, if the first words you say on the first of the month are “White Rabbits”, then you’ll have good luck for the rest of the month. There are lots of variations… some people think you can say “white rabbits” as early 12:01pm… some people count whispers… some people think it’s fine as long as you say it after waking up (even if you wake up in the middle of the night). I say it all of those times just to be safe, but my husband likes to say it as the first thing in his normal voice when he would normally wake up — that’s the most common variation I’ve ever come across.

So happy White Rabbits to you! May you have a month of good luck.

How superstitious was your family growing up? Did you become more or less superstitious with age?

Theme Parks versus National Parks

Last time we visited Florida, we thought about going to a theme park in Orlando, but the prices were through the roof so we checked out a near by national park instead.

We were thrilled to learn that they were conducting guided canoe tours of the river… and thankfully enough other people signed up, so down the river we went. The guide lead us under groves of mossy trees and I got to see my first alligator in the wild. (I learned my husband is nuts as he tried to get us closer — but thankfully the person in the back of the canoe got to steer!).

After the tour, we relaxed on the bank of the river with a snack. The lazy sun darted between the foliage, leaving beautiful reflections on the water. There was no doubt in my mind that we made the right decision. The magic and adventure of nature could never be re-created in a concrete theme park. I’m still amazed that America never tries to sell itself as a nature destination because there are so many gorgeous parks!

What was the last park you toured?

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