Like most kids, when our son learned he could point and make noise to ask for something he wanted, he also realized he could ask really loudly and aggressively to get our attention. That made my wife and I ask ourselves how can we teach manners before our son can talk?

The Secret of “Tah”

The solution we came up with was using “tah” instead of the word “please”. “Tah” was easy for him to say and we made him say it in a nice voice before we gave the object he wanted.

At first we just told him to say “tah”… then once he got the hang of it, we told him to “ask politely” whenever he forgot.

The change has been remarkable. Instead of constant screaming and pointing, we now have a son who points and asks nicely for what he wants. He learned it pretty quickly since there was the strong, immediately motivation of getting the toy he couldn’t reach.

Sign Language

Many parents use sign language as a tool to talk with their toddlers before they have learned to talk. However, our son was never interested in it so it didn’t work for us. From the moment he could make a sound, he wanted to make different sounds for different needs.

If you have a child that is interested in hand motions, sign language is a great way to say “please”. “Please” is signed by making small circles around your heart with one hand.

Our friends who have had success with sign language recommend using it yourself. It’s much easier for a toddler to understand “please” when he seems mom and dad using it with each other. Who knew toddlers learned through repetition?

Please Doesn’t Mean Spoiled

Just because a child says “please”, doesn’t mean they always get what they want. That’s called being spoiled. We’d never let our son play with a boiling pot of water simply because he said “tah”. However, both “tah” and sign language were a great introduction to manners.

Any other techniques we missed? Leave a comment and let us know how you taught manners to your young kids.

Recently our son caught a stomach bug. We were grateful it was pretty mild, but he was still uncomfortable and not very interested in food. No matter how much we offered him, he refused to eat very much.

The next day, he woke up screaming. My wife and I were sure he was even more sore from his cold and we weren’t quite sure how to comfort him. We brought his favorite toys and even some things he’s not normally allowed to play with. Nothing was working.

On a whim, I brought him some food. He pretty much leaped off my wife’s lap to grab it. He had already finished what I brought him by the time I could return with more. My wife and I were so “trapped” in the idea of a stomach bug, that it took us a while to see the obvious answer: he hadn’t eaten much for two days and was famished.

This got me thinking about how often we are all trapped in our thoughts. We get so focused that we only see one possible solution — and we get frustrated when that solution doesn’t work. So next time you’re banging your head against the wall, remember that your solution could be as simple as a bite of a banana. Take a step back. Brainstorm other alternatives. Try things you wouldn’t have normally tried and hopefully you’ll have your solution in no time.