My new friend is so great!
My new friend is the best.
My new friend says, “Thank you”
and never is a pest.
He always studies hard.
He always gets good grades.
When you want some help,
he never is afraid.
He’s good at every sport
and man does that guy ski.
His only little flaw
is that we’re both hungry.
Thanks for the ice creams!
We’re off to buy some stock.
In case I didn’t say:
My new friend is a rock.
With my magic book
I travel throughout time.
I usually take a trip
right before bedtime.
I’ve beat a dreadful witch
with my trusty duck.
I drove myself to school
in a monster truck.
I’ve camped on pink mountains.
I’ve sword-fought under sea.
I even caught a burglar
as tiny as flea.
With my magic book
I travel throughout time
’cause when I flip the page,
I see a different rhyme.
I was really gassy
visiting New York.
There were many times
I wished I had a cork.
I farted at museums
with Lady Liberty.
Then I was on Wall Street
and really set them free.
I tooted in Time Square
and blasted Central Park.
When we watched a play,
I butt-honked after dark.
I farted all the time.
I farted myself silly.
If you go to New York,
do NOT eat any chili!
I watched an epic race
between a horse and dog.
One drove in a race car.
The other rode a hog.
The counted down from five
before the light turned green.
Then smoke poured from their cars.
They floored their fast machines.
They spun around the track
so fast they were a blur.
The doggie finally won
but just by a whisker.
I shared a bowl of popcorn
with a kangaroo
and bought a pet koala
at the Sydney Zoo.
It turns out my Koala’s
an expert singing Strauss
so we sang together
at the Opera House.
After our big show
we met a cockatoo
who drove us to the beach
for a bar-be-que.
The bar-be-que was fun
but we had to keep it brief:
tomorrow we are going
to snorkel the great reef!
My locker squeaks.
My locker creaks.
My locker is the worst!
If I didn’t know better, I’d say the thing was cursed.
The handle broke.
The lock’s a joke.
It smells like underwear.
But worst of all I must share it with a grizzly bear.
My mother never taught me how to make my bed
so I had to learn from a unicorn instead.
With your mighty horn, you tuck the bottom in
Then bite an upper corner and pull it with your chin.
If you do not have a horn, you can use a pole
Just be extra careful or your bedding gets a hole.
The hail’s pouring down!
It’s bigger than bricks!
As soon as it’s done
we’ll have tons to fix.
The mailbox is shattered.
Our bird feeder’s gone.
I see giant craters
all over our lawn.
I want nothing more
than to go out and play.
But I’m stuck inside
doing homework all day!
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Authors Steve & Natasha